By Allan Yap & Nigel A. Skelchy

I absolutely DETEST the phrase "Straight acting."

What one earth is that supposed to mean? And do gay men actually stop to think about it?

I suppose it stems from a desire to encapsulate a behavioural pattern and associate oneself with a particular group of individuals who, because they don't LOOK gay, are perceived to be NOT gay!

What an absolute load of kaka!

I've known straight men who are comfortable with themselves who behave "softly" and gay men (and this is a huge turn off no matter what the personals say) who will associate themselves behaviourally with a bunch of red necks chawing baccy! And frankly, I couldn't give a damn!

Ooo, shades of Rhett Butler.

I've seen personals list that as an "attribute." I've seen it being referred to in reference to gay men in a supposedly academic paper (where it's more excusable because it referred to how gay men saw themselves) and I've heard some gay men talk about it proudly. Gag!

I wonder why people just aren't happy being themselves. If it gives you comfort to flap your arms and wrists, do so! If it gives you comfort to readjust yourself in public ( you know where) then do so. If you want to go bake a cake then do so. Who the bloody hell cares? I don't. I certainly don't have the time to entertain particular notions of a person being who they're SUPPOSED to be.

Be yourself!

I admit I'm a work in progress and one of Allan's cousin's called me "contradictory." I think he meant that sometimes what I thought and what I did were not always consistent. Well, there we have it. I'm contradictory and proud of it!

"Straight acting."

You spend all this time getting you head wrapped around the fact that you're gay, and then the minute you accept that, you spend all this time trying to convince people you're not! AND, here's the clincher, they're actually proud and relieved they're not, like, OMUHGOD, "faggy."

Good God! It just begs the question, if you're SO hung up on being straight why even BOTHER coming out in the first place. Go do what all closet homos do and get married!

Then call yourself "Straight Acting." I'm off to bake a cake!